No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize