You're a womanizer and a bitch.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize