I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize