im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
