So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Randomize
