I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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