Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Randomize
