Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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