I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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