I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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