This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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