Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
