Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
