Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
