someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
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I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
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The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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