you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
we should paint friendship bongs
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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