That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
