My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
