That's intense
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
You took a bar mat shot.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
