this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Fuck appropriateness.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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