I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.