Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
We had to coat check the pizza.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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