I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
