I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I just found a bag of teeth...
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
