I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Randomize
