Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
