Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
