Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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