am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
