i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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