O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
They took my balls.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize