Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Randomize
