I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
