what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I need moral support for this bender
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
