So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
