I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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