remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We have started to decorate penises.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize