i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've created a new STD.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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