Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
