so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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