so that wasnt chicken after all
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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