i wish there were pregnant emoticons
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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