Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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