what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
vagina is talking i cant
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize
