is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i dont even know how to be here
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
No I am not eating basil off your cock
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
