Will you blow on my dice?
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Floor bacon is actually really good
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
