Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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