Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
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You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
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I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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