recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
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