he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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