I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
